Team Murder No Brain No Headache.


The Horror Is Horrible…

Things and conversations going on around me while the bus rumbles through Boulder en route to less annoying places:

Two girls are talking about their ideal weddings at top volume and how much money each is of them is going to get from the family of their potential groom essentially by marrying in to the family. The whole time they are also talking about their distaste for traditional weddings. It's not often that I feel sorry for rich people...

A man borrows a woman's phone after telling her that he doesn't want to buy a cell phone because he can just borrow them from other people. He finishes a ten minute phone conversation complete with hushed tones and nervous glances around the bus which makes it look every bit the drug deal phone call. After he finishes he thanks the woman and then starts hitting on her by asking if she is married, if she has children, and if those children still live at home. At this point in the conversation I start getting really nervous because she seems annoyed but still readily answers all of his questions. For some reason he is wearing purple rubber gloves.

Somewhere in the back of the bus a baby is wailing. This is pretty annoying but the woman chanting what sounds like "shutupshutupshutupshitshitshit." I'm in the front of the bus but I can still hear them in a rhythm that mirrors that of the bus although I might just be imagining that part.

A sleeping girl is making noise in rhythm with the bus because her head is slamming into the window over and over and over again.

I often wonder during the course of these bus rides whether I am not part of some elaborate social psychology experiment but that would require far too much organization than would be necessary to explain this mess.

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